Love, Hope and Borders

While I wouldn’t want to ever go through the frightening process of Jose going to Cd. Juarez for his visa interview again, it was such a grounding time that truly made us realize what’s really important in life.

As a family, it taught us lessons that I often like to look back on especially when I have tough weeks or my anxiety seems to be crippling (which seems to be a bit heavier to carry during the pandemic).

During that time of unknown, the unknown of whether Jose would be receiving his permanent residency or not, all I wanted was for our family to remain together.

I didn’t care about the tiny day-to-day stuff. I wasn’t concerned about how my hair looked, or what outfit I’d wear to work. I wasn’t jealous of my neighbors for getting a new car or for one of my friends getting to go on a luxurious vacation. I wasn’t stressing about an error I made at work two days ago. I wanted to be able to hug Jose. That’s it. I wanted to be able to wake up next to him, and I wanted to know that he’d be coming back to Rockford.

While we will never forget the trials we had to go through to get to where we are now, it’s funny to realize how quickly things turn back to “normal.” I admit that I quickly get sucked into the small worries of the day-to-day, and I let things that are minute in the grand scheme of things get to me.

Today, I’m working on grounding myself. I want to stop overthinking all of this stupid small stuff, and live in the present. We’re all together. We have our health. We have a home, and a fridge full of food. Luisa gets to see her papa in person every day and make funny faces with him at meal time and dance with him in the kitchen, and for that we are truly blessed. Life is good.

-Haley